


The Inquisition Group Chat

by EmmG



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, M/M, Pure Crack, They all just text each other, group chat folly, i have no idea what this is, omfg, silly usernames
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-24
Updated: 2016-03-30
Packaged: 2018-05-28 20:55:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6344824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmmG/pseuds/EmmG
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Inquisition has a group chat. It's meant for serious matters. Everyone abuses it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. lol

**Author's Note:**

> Omfg I have no idea what this is. They just text each other. That's it. I don't even know if it's through phone texts or like some facebook chat and I don't care, I just don't fucking care

3:01 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- hihihihihihihihihiihi

3:01 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- Sera?

3:01 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- hjijjijijojojojdododo

3:02 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- u at the tavern?

3:02 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- fuck yes

3:02 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- coming

3:05 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- Vhenan, don't. It is late. You need to rest.

3:06 AM - **BronzeGod** \- Is there a party?

3:06 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- hihihihihihisjsishishsia

3:08 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- ur not invited asshole

3:09 AM - **BronzeGod** \- WHAT

3:10 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- TF SERA???

3:11 AM - **BronzeGod** \- WHAT SHE SAID

3:11 AM - **BronzeGod** \- I don't need u to get drunk

3:12 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- I go where Dorian goes

3:12 AM - **ChildOfTheStone** \- I don't think she meant you, Sparkler

3:13 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- Elfypants is not invited geez calm ur tits

3:12 AM - **BronzeGod** \- That's more sensible

3:12 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- To hear u ppl it's like ur fucking doryan

3: 13 AM - **BronzeGod** \- ******Dorian

3:13 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- Sera, please.

3:13 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- lol

3:14 AM - **BronzeGod** \- ew

3:14 AM - **BronzeGod** \- ew on both accounts

3:15 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- lolololol

3:15 AM - **ChildOfTheStone** \- So I'm bringing cards? Wicked Grace?

3:16 AM - **BeardOfPower** \- As long as we agree to play ONLY for money. I'm not losing my clothes again.

3:16 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- That only happened once.

3:16 AM - **BronzeGod** \- Now he pipes in

3:17 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- it's past ur bedtime baldy

3:17 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- BLACKWALL BRING UR BEARD

3:18 AM - **BeardOfPower** \- I shall try

3:18 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- sjsjjkqqjsmxmalalqq3223211

3:19 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- you all right vhenan?  <3 <3 <3

3:19 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- I tried to exit the conversation. It did not work out. Will you help me?

3:20 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- LOOOL

3:20 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- fail

3:21 AM - **BenHassrASS** \- That ass already has an owner

3:21 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- what

3:22 AM - **BronzeGod** \- What indeed

3:22 AM - **BenHassrASS** \- Oops

3:22 AM - **BenHassrASS** \- Forgot to scroll down

3:23 AM - **BenHassrASS** \- But yeah. I'm tapping that. Claimed it for the Qun

3:24 AM - **BronzeGod** \- NOT A PUBLIC MATTER BULL

3:24 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- Vhenan, how do I turn the sound off?

3:25 AM - **BenHassrASS** \- Bringing the Chargers

3:25 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- bring more booze

3:26 AM - **ChildOfTheStone** \- on it

3:30 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- Ellana?

4:20 AM - **BeardOfPower** \- Solas come help me carry them to bed

4:21 AM - **Cole** \- Solas is sleeping

4:22 AM - **ChildOfTheStone** \- u really don't get the concept of usernames kid.....


	2. wow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Take two. Realized I pasted the wrong file, tried to correct it, and ended up deleting the whole thing instead. Bravo me.

10:00 AM - **SeekerCassandra** \- The library is missing books. They must be returned.

10:00 AM - **ChildOfTheStone** \- Wow

10:00 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- wow

10:01 AM - **BronzeGod** \- Wow

10:01 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- wow

10:01 AM - **BronzeGod** \- Incidentally, what are we wow-ing about?

10:01 AM - **ChildOfTheStone** \- The Seeker's username. It's bad. Real bad

10:02 AM - **BronzeGod** \- Oh yes

10:02 AM - **BronzeGod** \- Wow

10:03 AM - **SeekerCassandra** \- It's straight and to the point. Unlike you, Dorian.

10:03 AM - **BronzeGod** \- I am only one of those things

10:03 AM - **BronzeGod** \- ;)

10:04 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- LOOL

10:04 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- The books you seek are in the kitchens, Cassandra. Sera hid them in a sack of flour.

10:04 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- STFU

10:05 AM - **SeekerCassandra** \- Thank you, Solas. I will return them to the library.

10:05 AM - **ChildOfTheStone** \- Suuuuure... the "library" ;)

10:05 AM - **SeekerCassandra** \- I don't know what you're trying to insinuate, dwarf.

10:06 AM - **ChildOfTheStone** \- Hmmm quick reply for one who claims cluelessness

10:06 AM - **SeekerCassandra** \- And your username isn't much better.

10:08 AM - **KirkwallBabe** \- Oh but I think it is

10:08 AM - **BronzeGod** \- I approve of this change

10:09 AM - **KirkwallBabe** \- Thank you, my friend

10:09 AM - **KirkwallBabe** \- No shame in being a romantic, Seeker

10:09 AM - **KirkwallBabe** \- Our group is in dire need of those

10:10 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- excuse u

10:10 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- im a romantic

10:11 AM - **CorypheysSlayer1** \- and solas too ^_^

10:11 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- LOOOOOOOOOOOOL

10:11 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- lol sera we're the only ones not in a dysfunctional relationship

10:12 AM - **BronzeGod** \- I give it six months tops

10:12 AM - **BronzeGod** \- Bets are on

10:12 AM - **KirkwallBabe** \- I second that. Raising five sovereigns

10:13 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- fuck yall

10:13 AM - **BronzeGod** \- I'll pass

10:13 AM - **BeardOfPower** \- touché

10:14 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- BLACKWALL!!!!!!

10:14 AM - **BeardOfPower** \- =)

10:15 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- nvr do that again

10:15 AM - **BeardOfPower** \- =(

10:15 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- Don't listen to them, Ellana. They are being juvenile.

10:16 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- Ik

10:16 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- lol at least i don't pretend i don't have a boyfriend DORIAN

10:16 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- They just want a rise out of you.

10:17 AM - **BronzeGod** \- Fade tongue says what

10:17 AM - **BronzeGod** \- Oh yes Solas, she told me. Nice moves.

10:17 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- i fucking knew it

10:18 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- BLACKWALL WE WERE RIGHT

10:19 AM - **BeardOfPower** \- so solas how does it work. do you just go in and do the deed. float on clouds

10:19 AM - **BeardOfPower** \- we're curious. share your knowledge

10:19 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- morons

10:20 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- That is not how the 69 works.

10:20 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- I mean the 69.

10:20 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- 69

10:20 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- 69

10:21 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- F-a-d-e

10:21 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- Something appears to be broken, I apologize.

10:21 AM - **BronzeGod** \- Oh no, whatever is the matter

10:22 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- perv

10:22 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- called it

10:22 AM - **BeardOfPower** \- fade tongue aaaahhhh

10:23 AM - **BronzeGod** \- Solas is a sensualist. It is perfectly acceptable

10:23 AM - **BronzeGod** \- That is the only explanation

10:24 AM - **BronzeGod** \- No one tampered with your phone, I swear

10:24 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- This is immature.

10:25 AM - **SeekerCassandra** \- I'll help you change it back, Solas. They did the same to me a week ago.

10:25 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- Many thanks.

10:25 AM - **CorypheusSlayer1** \- I LOVE YOU VHENAN BUT LOL

10:26 AM - **UnregisteredUser** \- No. Not "lol".

10:27 AM - **BronzeGod** \- Josephine Alert

10:27 AM - **BronzeGod** \- Hide or she'll assign you some task

10:28 AM - **ReddestJenny** \- fucking outta here

3:04 PM - **ElvenGlory69** \- Dorian, I can't find you. I would like to discuss those shards we found.

3:05 PM - **ElvenGlory69** \- Who did this?

3:05 PM - **BronzeGod** \- Wow

3:05 PM - **KirkwallBabe** \- How do I always miss the best parts???

3:06 PM - **ReddestJenny** \- wow


End file.
